Hey Reader,
This is the part of my story I never thought I’d share… I disappeared the last half a year for a reason. This is what really happened.
I shared this post last night, and then wept while Luke held me. It wasn't sadness. It was the feeling of completion that honored many past versions of myself.
And to share the story with you, it shifted something within me. I wasn't going to share, but I'm so glad I did. Because it anchored me into the power of what I've done, and I collected all of the past versions of myself. The ones who feared I would never find answers, the ones who were sick and searching for answers. The hopeless versions.
A picture is worth 1000 words; you can see the documented visual journey on my Instagram post here (it's exactly the same as this email, just with the pictures). These photos are extremely vulnerable for me to share.
And If you'd rather just read the story without photos, here you go:
Something you may not know about me: I was born with chronic illness. And at 20, I was diagnosed with 7 autoimmune diseases. I said no to the medicaI industrial complex and started what has now been a 10 year journey to heal my body naturally.
And 3 years ago, I found the answers I was looking for. And if it wasn’t for my embodiment in my human design, I would not have found it. It took 7 years of mistakes, following roads that led nowhere, listening to the advice of people who didn’t fully understand some very well-hidden and suppressed knowledge about the body.
Those 7 years showed me what didn’t work so I could find out what did. (And no, this post is not the space to come and ask me more, you’ll see why below.)
And with tears in my eyes as I write this: I did it. As I welcomed in my 30th year, I didn’t just put the symptoms into a manageable place. I completely reversed and healed things that the world and medicaI industry said were impossible to heal. And it truly was the hardest thing I’ve ever done, and the most profoundly transformational.
I went through a dark night within this journey, studying full body lymphatic de tox and cellular regeneration for 3 years, mastering lymphatic healing and kidney regeneration through many processes including high frequency living nourishment and herbal support. My journey was the full 3 years with massive difficulties and dedication, but I had been preparing for my 105 day mono juice fast the entire time. This fast was only the centerpiece. Around it was a whole ecosystem of preparation, healing, and practices, too many to list in one post, that all made the depth of my regeneration possible.
The pain was beyond words. Unbearable doesn’t even come close (maybe someday I will share more). I experienced the emotional and physical de tox of every past decision I had ever made. I also carried what was generationally passed down: pain, patterns, and toxins I never consciously chose, but still had to release.
For three months, I was bedridden. The things I released caused immense pain, and I had to trust my timing while the world kept moving without me.
Spiritually, I am not the same person. Every layer I released was a death of self, and I had to believe the woman being born on the other side would be worth it.
I lost my best friend, my sweet cat Celeste, to a sudden brain aneurysm. Grieving her while grieving so many parts of myself cracked me open.
I truly believe, on a poisoned planet, detox is one of the most karma healing and spiritual things a person can go through. I had to be willing to be wrong over and over, and I had to stop listening to advice from people trained by systems that didn’t hold the answers for me.
And also, this is not what this page is about. I was hoping to teach this one day because not only am I deeply informed and studied, I’ve also walked through the fire, and my partner Luke is a certified de-toxification specialist. But my journey hurt my heart. The depth of it and how painful detox was is something I know the planet needs, but deciding if we are going to lead it and teach it for others is something I will be sitting with.
This path is highly controversial because it has been hidden and intentionally suppressed to keep humanity in lower frequencies. To even open to it requires dying to yourself again and again while everyone around you projects fear. It takes massive discipline. Sharing deeply c e n s o r e d and suppressed teachings is something my spirit needs to be ready for if that is part of my purpose.
Now, I’m rebuilding. And finally (oh, I’ve been waiting with unbridled anticipation), I get to be back online and serving in my business. Are there still hard days when my body repair has me very tired? Yes. But this work is the work, and the 80 year old version of me is so happy I did it. The energy I have now, the joy, the clarity, the intuition, the lightness I feel in my system, they are on a level I didn’t know humans could experience.
I love my business.
It has always been an expression of my purpose and lights me up so much. There are very few things that bring me as much joy as helping someone break out of an old matrix of conditioning and expand their life, abundance, and awakening.
Because I lead my life in the same way. My life has never made sense, and the amount of gratitude I feel on a daily basis holds my heart space wide open to life.
I live in the most beautiful place on the planet instead of just dreaming about taking a week long vacation here. I work for myself instead of reporting to a boss. I can take a detox journey and do whatever it takes to heal my body because of the abundance I created.
I’m so happy to be returning with a new body.
This is why I do what I do,
So women don’t have to work in a cubicle until they are 65 if they don’t want to.
So women can make so much money that they can move to a place that lights their soul on fire,
Or create enough overflow that they can fully heal their body,
Elevate their family through wealth.
So, do things have to be hard? Is it true that the road to hell feels like heaven and the road to heaven feels like hell? No. Not always, but sometimes it will.
There have been things on my Human Design alignment journey that have been so easy. Calling in Luke, my 500k year, teaching what I teach in my business and serving my clients, it has always come so naturally to me.
But the things that led up to it? I had to see I was in a misaligned relationship and leave to call in Luke, which broke my heart. Moving to Costa Rica, I had to see what the US was doing to my health and frequency and choose nature over concrete jungles. To even have the ability to create a 500k year and 100k month, I had to let go of misaligned team members, fire clients, move through doubt, decide the cubicle and having a boss were not for me, and move through initiation after initiation.
Do I believe in ease? Yes. Do I search for easy? No. I am willing to do what it takes to create what I am here to create and also believe I am deeply supported. And if something is harder than I could have ever imagined, I thank it.
Because, where I am not willing to settle is exactly where I will create a new world.
I am so excited to serve and support you more from a new version of myself.
So much is coming.
Much love,
